I've been working on project that is of significant importance and size for me personally. I've made conscious efforts to keep it low key, telling very few people what I am possibly formulating. I have my reasons, mostly that continually talking about it to a multitude of others seems to leak some of the energy required to create my vision. But now I've come to a stage of the process where I am in need of more external and professional guidance.
You see I initially approached this venture intentionally not seeking any expert advice or coaching. I wanted it to be authentic, for me it felt as though if I weighed my mind down with all the "shoulds" and "musts" I would lose my voice. At this stage I stand holding that which I've been shaping and molding and know I am in need of some additional and qualified input so that I might represent myself and my work in its best and true light. Now comes the fine tuning and I require another pair of eyes to to help me with the refining touches. I knew this stage was coming but nevertheless I did not welcome it.
"Ugh," was my mind's response to to what I was about to do. All I could see and feel was more work coming my way and pressure to get it right as someone else began to shine a light on matters that I had overlooked. "Why am I doing this to myself?" I wondered. Of course when I posed that question I was referring to embarking on this adventure as a whole. But, what soon became clear to me was that I should be asking this same question about the mindset I had approaching this next level. "Yes, why am I doing this to myself- preceding as if all that follows will be fraught with stress, strain and toil?" All that created for me was misery and the feelings of an insurmountable task.
Every day I set the intention to live with love, ease and compassion. While all three are applicable for any area of our lives, it was the word "ease" that was attempting to guide me. The light bulb that had begun to dim in my unconsciousness began to flicker back once more, reminding me that the universe was not hellbent on creating misery for me. When I received the feedback that I was asking for on my project I could be consumed with an overwhelming exasperation at the task that was before me or I could permit myself to believe the truth that none of this has to be hard. Of course I could continue with ease. That's not to say I could turn on Netflix, sit on my couch and watch season after season of some TV series that peaked my interest. The universe could not perform my tasks for me, but it would willingly make the road a smooth one if I allowed it. Inching closer to my goal would require effort on my part but it did not have to be work. Those two words hold a very different energy and I chose to see the path before as a gentle and joyous unfolding, not one comparable to the drudgery of a state mandated hard labor sentencing.
Another layer in embracing the ease factor was to not get caught up into how I was going to accomplish all that lay before me. My mind saw the mountain I had to climb and said, "How the hell am I ever going to get to the top of that?" I felt as though I wanted to abandon this ridiculous and grandiose trek and save myself the hassle. The answer to my question was, "I don't know." But here's the twist, I could drown in the feelings of ineptness or I could give myself permission to not have all the answers mapped out. On the heels of, 'I don't know' was the next key phrase on easy street, "...and that's okay."
All that was truly being asked of me was to take one step, not the entire journey in one fell swoop, and allow it to be fun and inviting. And so I began, letting go of the big picture and instead giving my time and focus to one key factor, being sure to ask for the universe's support as I embarked on the next stage. That was also key for me to ask for guidance and support as it released the notion that this was all up to me to figure out. "Nah," the universal beings seemed to be saying to me. "We've got your back and this is a team effort." And so I began with an air of lightness and excitement on this next leg of my adventure.
Our society not so subtly implies that any goal we set or strive to meet requires blood, sweat and tears and if none of that is present as we make our way through life and towards our dreams, well then we're not giving it our all. I challenge that. We can give our all an expect it to be buoyed in an idyllic easiness as the helping hands of the universe reach out to us and say, "Let's begin."
Be well and happy.
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